I just love it when I stumble upon stuff like this. I’m unfortunately spending the evening calling credit card and utility companies to switch our service to our new address in Cupertino. (Yes, it took me this long to get around to it, and yes, we’ve already gone back to our old mailbox and picked up all our old mail.) Anyhow, I’m on the phone with the electric and gas company out here (called PG&E) and I’m listening to the automated phone options they give you, and the recorded woman says this:

“For gas leaks, downed electrical wires, or any other kind of dangerous hazard, press ‘3.’”

Now, what exactly happens if I press “3”?

I really like the way that, in my own twisted little world, the “any other kind of dangerous hazard,” leaves it totally open-ended to the kind of destruction I might cause. That really kept me on my toes.

I was a little disappointed that I only ended up vaporizing a house down the block. I was hoping for something more colorful, or at least noisy.


  1. Posted April 6, 2004 at 8:57 pm | Permalink

    Thanks for the reminder. I have to get Xcel Energy to change the light bulb in the streetlight outside our house. Our street corner has been dark for several months now.

  2. eddie
    Posted April 7, 2004 at 5:17 am | Permalink

    That’s funny (:!

  3. Neal
    Posted April 7, 2004 at 8:38 am | Permalink

    We have the crappiest streetlight EVER. See, it works, lighting up that corner and part of the street very well. The problem is, it’ll turn on for anywhere from 30 seconds to 10 minutes, and then turn off for an indefinite period of time. Woohoo. Sounds like the customer service for Dell.

  4. Posted April 7, 2004 at 5:57 pm | Permalink

    I remembered again today, and actually called Xcel Energy. The fellow gave me a phone number, and told me it is only open from 7:30 am to 4:00 pm. So…another long, cold, dark night here in Minnesnowda.

  5. Posted April 8, 2004 at 10:50 am | Permalink

    Gosh, I just love dealing with Monopolies. They always put the customer first…er…um…yeah.

  6. POP
    Posted April 9, 2004 at 6:49 am | Permalink

    Wow, I called Xcel, and if you’re patient and listen long enough you get, “To change the malfunctioning streetlights outside of Ted’s and Neal’s residences press…….” Hey, give it a try.


  7. Neal
    Posted April 9, 2004 at 8:32 am | Permalink

    Really? I guess I should have waited longer than 30 minutes for the list to get done.

  8. Posted April 9, 2004 at 8:34 am | Permalink

    LOL! I love how you guys humor me. 🙂

  9. POP
    Posted April 10, 2004 at 6:15 am | Permalink

    And what other choice do we have?


  10. Neal
    Posted April 10, 2004 at 9:20 pm | Permalink

    You? I was making myself laugh and reminding myself (as I do every day) how hilarious I am. Making you feel humored might have been a distant second to that… maybe. 😉

  11. Posted April 12, 2004 at 10:32 pm | Permalink

    I got ahold of a lady in the “Outdoor Lighting Department”. I gave her my street address and phone number, and she said that she would send a truck out to our place to change the bulb. However, nothing has happened yet. Perhaps it takes a few days for things to get done.

  12. Posted April 17, 2004 at 5:13 pm | Permalink

    Ted, any news on that street light? You have me really worried…poor thing being left without a street light.

    Did I mention that most streets in California don’t have lights? It’s so weird. You’re trying to find someones house in the dark and you have a really hard time because you can’t see anything. We light everything in Minnesota…everything except Ted’s house.