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…and how do I commemorate/christen the event? I walk to the Ace Hardware store down the street to buy a roll of Scott tissue paper, bring it home (yes, a word with new meaning for me), and, with gusto and a twinkle in my eye, mark my territory. I own this square footage.

Five- hundred and fifty. It sounds bigger when I write it out. It is small, but when you’re not a giant you need not a giant’s space. More efficient. I think short people will be the way of the future.

Anyway, here are some photos from the MLS site. Some are not of my specific unit, but you’ll get the idea.

So, new address:

1821 1st Avenue South #306
Minneapolis, MN 55403

The second thing I did to celebrate my new home was the laundry. Goodbye laundromats! Yippy-kai-yay!

Do you ever find yourself in a situation where you have some strong urge or desire to act where the morality is ambiguous and no matter how much you think about it it doesn’t become clearer? Then you finally do act on it and in your conscious mind you believe your intentions are altruistic, but you’re not quite sure what’s lurking in your subconsciousness. You suspect you’re not as unexpecting as you’ve convinced yourself you are, or as empathetic. But you still do it. You take the chance that the loving intentions overwhelm the selfish enough to come through.

It a leap that’s fricken scary and exhilarating, like releasing an adolescent lion bred in captivity into the wild. It’s out of your hands, free to do its work, but it may come back and hunt you.

I’m a week from closing on my first piece of real estate. I’m approaching 30, divorced and single, no kids, am making just enough to buy a 550 sq. ft. condo (and that’s stretching it a little), and haven’t thought much about preparing for retirement. At this age my mom had two kids, on her second marriage, owned house and was the sales manager of the business at which she worked. My dad had, I think, 4-going-on-5 kids, had been in the army, was married still, had two houses in Hawaii, and was well established in his career as a Sears repairman. It seems like they had so much more responsibility and investment at my age than I do at my age.

The thing is, I don’t want kids right now. I’m not ready for kids right now; there’s not even a prospective mother. Buying this condo has freaked me out a little. It means I need to stick around for a while. But I am less jittery about being in one place now. Much less so! Heck, I’ve been living in this apartment for 4 years already. I think I have figured out that it’s not commitment that freaks me out, it’s commitment when I have no room to flex. If it’s right, I can commit wholeheartedly.

I love where I am right now career-wise. I like the variety, and I like that I don’t have to “report” to anybody, and I like that I get to create and get to deal with people a little. I’m not sure how much longer I will sub as I am getting weary of not being able to build longer relationships, but the pros outweigh the cons right now. I will dance for the rest of my life, though, to some degree. That feels right.

I love that I am moving into a condo with an association that takes care of the building maintenance. I can still leave for touring and not have to think about mowing the lawn. I still have Pumpkin to find care for, but I know lots of cat lovers. I love that I will own it and that I am not throwing money away in rent. I love that it fits me.

I love that I am single because I can do a lot of stuff that I couldn’t do if I wasn’t. I still have responsibility for Pumpkin and bills and loans, but I am free to follow my volition. Yet, that’s what’s lacking, too. I want, eventually, to be responsible to someone and for someones. I really am, mostly, content with where I am, but if the right ship comes by, boy, I will leap from the pier.

I am much wiser than I was five years ago, but I still feel like a kid often. I still feel like I’ve yet to find my “place.” A home. Yes, yes, yes, that’s probably heavenly longing, but it’s also a longing to find residence outside of myself and in someone else.

Little by little I am investing myself so that hopefully someday I will be able to focus my energies on taking care of someone else because I’m being taken care of myself. Well, maybe I have thought of retirement more than I had believed I had. I don’t really care that much about the money part though. Never have. Right now I am saving up ideas and places and jokes and memories to share with my progeny and wife. Like I said, I need room to flex, but with trust that, like a muscle, I’m still attached.

… could save you now. I can’t believe this guy! What the…! There is a whole slew of these filling webspace!

Truly. Pitiful.

I just got some headshots for the first time in my life yesterday. I never needed them before, but this Choreographer’s Evening thing wants them (my piece Melisma made it in). The photographer, Paul Virtucio, is a friend and he is wonderful at encouraging. I feel stupid when I have to pose for pictures, especially if I have to be serious, but he gave me these little goals and attitudes to try on that distracted me enough to relax. He photographs a lot of the dance companies in the Twin Cities, too. So, here are the few I was mulling over. The one I eventually chose for the program is the first one in the second column. It came down to that one and the three in the last row. Tough decision. Unfortunately, the very last one is my favorite, but it was denied because, well… it’s a family show.

The other day I was teaching a class of sixth graders and they were working on a science project called “Whir and Ding.” It had their attention. Anyway, one kid broke out into “If You’re Happy and You Know It.” As he kept singing he started “clapping” other body parts and he seemed to particularly enjoy hitting his face. So, I started singing, ” If you’re stupid and you know it, clap your face.” Of course, this kid lit up and smacked his own face even more vehemently. Other kids laughed, and on the second round a few more kids joined in on the masochism. A few more verses and almost everybody in the class was participating, each finding immeasurable delight in smacking themselves. The funny thing is is that their focus on their projects was even more honed following this corporal distraction. Oh! And I can assure you, their faces surely showed it.