My thoughts have been side-tracked a few times the last couple weeks when I have noticed how much more enjoyable eating is when I breathe while I chew. I mean, it wasn’t like I held my breath before, but I would breathe only enough to not die. My focus has nearly always been getting as much food in my belly before my stomach reflexes could tell me I’m full. This was especially important in my teenage years when my body needed so much food that even if I did stuff myself I was hungry an hour to an hour and a half later; I was kind of like a Hobbit that way.

I remember high school classes were so hard to get through because my stomach would constantly distract me and most teachers wouldn’t let me eat during class. Eating would get me out of bed in the morning and put me to sleep at night. It was almost always the first thing I thought of when I had free time. My brother was he same way and we’d often contest for left-overs. We were like wolves, our stomachs growling.

So, I’ve learned to eat first, breathe later. Which often led to hiccups… and gas. But at least my mind was free to think about other, less immediate things.

As I get older it has become clear that I don’t need as much food. I still eat more than most people I know, especially when I have a performance coming up, but my body doesn’t need nearly as much as I did even a few years ago. I still use a lot of energy, so I’m not sure if it’s just because I’m getting older. I am also eating better. I have been cutting down on meat(trying to eat only organic and free-range meat, which is more expensive and forces me to buy less) and eating more natural sugars and more veggies. I’ve cut out fast food entirely(but that is mostly an ethical decision). I’ve noticed a more constant energy and less crashing and hypoglycemic-like irritability.

Ironically, I still eat fast. But for some reason, the last few weeks I have been taking deep breaths while I chew and the weirdest sense of nostalgia happens. It’s like I’m eating all those foods for the first time. Apples. Squash. Curry. Asparagus. Dark chocolate. Milk. Pepperoni pizza. Pulled pork. Canned peaches. Cheese curds. Pad Thai. Edamame. Red Anjou pears. I keep saying in my head, “Oh wow! That’s why I like that so much!” And then I do that thing where you chew the food on the other side and it will taste markedly different. This has slowed me down some, maybe only a minute or so, but I’m starting to understand what people meant when they’d tell me to slow down and enjoy the food. To me, before this, enjoyment was simply just the pull of a five pound ball of food in the bottom of my stomach.